There were eight pieces of fudge on the little plate at the end of the refreshment buffet on Sunday after the morning service at the church we visited. There were 110 people in attendance.
If I had made that fudge, I would have eaten all eight pieces myself rather than subject 102 people to fudgeless disappointment. I’m considerate that way. But that’s not the point. The point is that a girl of around 10 came up to the table and took four pieces. Four! Do the math.
Another time we were invited to a scanty church potluck where fried chicken was the main course, with a few meager sides to beef it up a tad. Having let an unrelated teen go ahead of him, my husband (the guest of honor) stood at the end of the line. When he and the teen arrived at the buffet table, there were two large pieces of chicken left in the bucket, and two people left in line. The teen took both pieces.
At that same church potluck, a late arrival showed up with a couple pizzas. No sooner had the pizzas been set down, then one of the leaders of the church said to his own kids (who had been near the front of the line and still had chicken on their plates), “Hurry and get some pizza before everyone else takes it!” What does that say to our kids? I’ll tell you what it says–me first.
And try talking to most people with kids for more than 30 seconds without interruption after interruption. It’s exasperating! (Especially when it’s my kids!)
These are just a few of the many instances that set my children off on a tirade about manners, and how rare common courtesy is in their generation. It was the fudge incident that made one of my daughters demand that children everywhere learn manners…and she wasn’t planning to have any fudge.
Manners matter.
I don’t expect that my children place their knives at the proper angle to indicate they are finished eating and I don’t harp too terribly much about elbows on the table, even though they cause spills and bumps and limited room. (Okay, maybe I do harp about the elbows on the table.) I do, however, expect my family to master common courtesy, because that’s what manners are, respect and courtesy for the comfort of those around you.
Ten basic manners to instill in your children:
- Let others go first.
- Give up your seat.
- Chew with your mouth shut…and eat quietly.
- Don’t talk with food in your mouth.
- Say please, thank you, and excuse me.
- Take one…or none.
- Share.
- Make eye contact.
- Shake hands.
- Don’t interrupt.
These can all be summed up in the Biblical concept of putting others ahead of yourself. All of them!
Please don’t think my family has these manners mastered–everybody in life needs training or tweaking, because that’s part of the journey. But we’re always working on them. Train, tweak, train, tweak…see? Let’s work on them together! I’ll be addressing some of these manners this week right here and then once a month, and also focusing on them monthly with my own family in our real world.
Please subscribe to my weekly newsletter and follow on Facebook and Instagram to join in the fun.
Please take the time to make the world a better place beginning with your child…please!
Thank you!
What manners do you like to see in children?
This post is part of a week of blog hopping hosted by The Schoolhouse Review Crew: 5 Days of Homeschool Blog Hop.
SO true- when I can (and I often can) I will tell the church children that they have to wait until a parent arrives to go to the treat table. It is so sad to see kids that DO have enough to act like vultures. But it does start with the adults.
A friend told me about the children in Nigeria who are so protein deprived that they eat the bones of a chicken just to get the marrow. Such a different world. I think about that often when I see the plenty on our tables and how so many kids (and adults) act like it’s not enough or that they won’t get their share. Yeah, I’m guilty, too. 😉
I hadn’t heard that one before “take one or none”… hmm… I’ll have to think about that one for a bit.